Roman Baths, Aqueducts, Engineering n things

Still on the subject of creating fun and learnable history for kids, as is the mission of

http://www.history-for-kids.com/

a website in the course of construction and which has commisioned me to write some contributions, my piece today was inspired by two gems I was reminded of /came across

a) the bit of script in the Life of Brian which goes something like this"All right... all right... but apart from better sanitation and medicine and education and irrigation and public health and roads and a freshwater system and baths and public order... what have the Romans done for us?"
and b) a funny piece of doggerel by an Australian who explained why the whole World ended up with railway carriages that run on tracks four feet eight and one-half inches wide. (The Stephenson Gauge or Standard Gauge)

Here is my poem

What the Romans Did for Us

Next time you're on a train

Notice how long and skinny they are

They're not much wider

Than your Daddy's car

You have to use a calendar

Because trains are thin

If you don't book a seat

They'll just not let you in

The Romans gave us our calendar

Which is very handy, coz
Without dates, you wouldn't know

When your birthday was

If you look out the train window

You might see tall arches over deep valleys

That's a Roman invented aqueduct

It's water that it carries

And if you're ill through overcrowding

Because the trains are thin

Say thanks to the Romans

For they brought us medicine

And the train will be safe from robbers

(Coz they're now all running banks)

For our system of law and order

The Romans deserve our thanks

If you're travelling in the Winter

You'll be cozy on the train

Because of the central heating

We can thank those Romans again

If you're travelling in the Summer

Thank the Romans for this too

For without the baths they invented

We'd all be Stinky Poo

If from the window, you see cars

And trucks with heavy loads

They'll be travelling fast and straight

Along what once were Roman roads

And in giving thanks to the Romans

Gratitude is what we say

Why, even that word is Roman
As are many, we speak today

And do you know why trains are skinny

Why they're not very fat

Well, we can blame the Romans..yes blame

We can blame them for that

Trains were made thin

To match the tramways in the street

They kept them the same width

To keep everything neat

The tramlines were that size

Because of the covered wagons before

They already had the manufacturing jigs

And they didn't want to make more

Image from http://sabbah.biz/mt/images/jerash033fb.jpg

The wagons were that size

To match the ruts in the roads

Caused by the Romans with their chariots

Carrying heavy loads

The chariots were that size

Not very wide

To attach the shafts to two horses

Running side by side

The Romans should have used animals

Like an elephant or hippo or bull

If they'd had much bigger bottoms

Our trains wouldn't get so full

So next time your train arrives

And it's already full when it comes
Say loudly "All right... the Romans give us sanitation, roads, aqueducts,blah..blah...
But they should have used animals... ...with much bigger bums

Jon Bratton 2009

Links

Graeme King's poem about the width of trains

For the Romans in Britain...a poem in 40 words, click the link

Roman Baths, Aqueducts, Engineering n things

©

This 'Roman Baths, Aqueducts, Engineering n things' blog entry is copyright Jon Bratton 2009.

This material is free to use for personal use but may not be lifted in whole or part by website publishers

Hadrian's Wall Poem W H Auden

Dawn at Housesteads Fort. Early morning in Autumn 2006. Photo: Joan Thirlaway.

As a Hadrian's Wall poet, myself...since Tuesday gone, I'm delighted to be in the company of W H Auden who wrote 'Roman Wall Blues' and like me, mentioned the dodgy weather in bleak Northumberland.

Hadrian's Wall is the description most used all over the World to describe this edifice but I live near it and I can tell you that most folks round here call it the Roman Wall.

When I came across this poem by W H Auden who I thought was American I was surprised with the title...but I now know that Auden was born in York and in his formative years he attended a school in and around the Pennines.

Per Wikipedia "...his visits to the Pennine landscape and its declining lead-mining industry figure in many of his poems..." Rookhope is a former lead and fluorspar mining village in County Durham, in England. It first existed as a group of cattle farms in the 13th Century. It is situated in the Pennines to the north of Weardale and it is here that Auden realised he wanted to be a poet. So that nicely explains why his poem is entitled Roman Wall Blues and not Hadrian's Wall Blues

And speaking of 'Blues', a word he clearly likes, I know of Auden because of his "Funeral Blues" ("Stop all the clocks") which was read aloud in the film Four Weddings and a Funeral(1994). He also wrote Refugees Blues. It is likely that all these were originally written as blues song lyrics rather than poems per se

Anyway, here is the poem

Roman Wall Blues

Over the heather the wet wind blows,

I've lice in my tunic and a cold in my nose.

The rain comes pattering out of the sky,

I'm a Wall soldier, I don't know why.

The mist creeps over the hard grey stone,

My girl's in Tungria; I sleep alone.

Aulus goes hanging around her place,

I don't like his manners, I don't like his face.

Piso's a Christian, he worships a fish;

There'd be no kissing if he had his wish.

She gave me a ring but I diced it away;

I want my girl and I want my pay.

When I'm a veteran with only one eye

I shall do nothing but look at the sky.

W. H. Auden

©

This 'Hadrian's Wall Poem W H Auden' blog entry is copyright Jon Bratton 2009.This material is free to use for personal use but may not be lifted in whole or part by website publishers

History for Kids

My nephew has just started a website called, and about, History for Kids which he uses to showcase his growing collection of bedtime stories, written in rhyme, and about aspects of history from the birth of the moon to men on the moon. What a lovely idea. The kids love 'em and they don't even realise they're being educated. Having written them he's presenting them to the World as a free (for non commercial use) resource to Mums (Moms) (Mams) and Dads and teachers

The beauty of writing in rhyme is that it is fun, light hearted and memorable. Because, as you know, I'm a doggerel writer myself he invited me yesterday to make a contribution which was very opportune because I knew I'd have a few hours to kill while I hung around hospital waiting rooms as my 84 year old mother went through a series of checks which involved, and I'm speaking in medical jargon here, putting delicate instruments into delicate places

So I wrote a history for kids poem. Being a Geordie I wrote about our UNESCO World Heritage site, Hadrian's Wall, a bit of which is pictured. So here goes

In 43AD
That's a long, long time ago
The Romans invaded Britain
Which is awful...isn't that so?

They took over England and Wales
They didn't want Scotland at all

And to stop the Scots from stealing the sheep
They built a very big wall

It stretched from the Solway Firth in the west
To the River Tyne in the east
A 70 mile wall would need lots of stones
40 million at least

History for kids Hadrian's Wall

The Emperor was in charge of the work
Hadrian was his name
He probably built lots of things
But his wall gave him lasting fame

It took 6 years to build the wall
There were no fancy machines back then
They needed hundreds of horses to pull the carts
And thousands of working men

And every mile they built forts and turrets
That were very tall
So the soldiers could see any Scotsmen
Trying to climb the wall

History for Kids, Hadrian's Wall

The wall lasted throughout the Romans' stay
400 years, altogether
I wonder why they stayed so long
It couldn't have been the weather

It was 40 years after the Romans left

That the Britons again had to fight
Because the Saxons came from Germany
But that's a story for another night

That the wall was very strong
Would be fair to say
It was built nearly 2000 years ago
And it still stands today

History for Kids, Hadrian's Wall

Indeed, from all around the World

Tourists make a call

To the north end of Britain
To see the famous Hadrian's Wall

As now as you go to sleep
Think about this great wall
And wonder if this was the place
Where Humpty had his great fall

Jon Bratton 2009

Want more, do you think?
Then just click on the link

History for Kids

This History for Kids Hadrian's Wall poem and blog entry is copyright Jon Bratton 2009. Parents and teachers are welcome to use it for non commercial purposes and it may be used by www.history-for-kids.com who inspired its writing

Making Money Online

Image from http://www.britishrecycledproducts.co.uk

I love making money online
Money to spend and to keep
The money I love best of all
Is the money I make as I sleep

I have just created two pages on my main poems website which promotes the web host I use because I may make some commision but mainly because I have become evangelical about making money from websites. In these difficult times it is very comforting that my wwwebsites work 24 hours per day, 168 hours per week.

If you google 'making money online' you'll be presented with a host of schames... oh look at that Freudian typo. I meant to say schemes and it came out scams

In the blurb I have written on verses4cards I've been brutally honest about how much work I put into building my websites but I've also been candid about the money that can be made by putting Google Ads on each page.

Building a website is a bit like building a round selling say kleeneze. You do all the hard work and you make money, by doing nothing else if you build a website and by selling things to your customers by keep going to see them, if you built a round. If you didn't have to keep seeing the customers you could build another round and then another.

I've now got two websites and three more under development plus this blog

Americans who crave working from home...and not having a boss...see $3,000 per month as the point they would happily kiss the boss goodbye and that's the figure I've now passed and which I target in my explanation

If you're curious to know more click this link Making Money Online to see my explanation and here. to go to my About Me page which also gives data.

I'm writing this now partly because the web host I use is running a Spring Special where the price is is a third of what it normally is, but to be honest it was only a matter of time before I became evangelical to you guys

This 'making money online' poem and blog entry is copyright Jon Bratton 2009

Mothers Day Poems

Mothers Day Poems

I didn't write 'em...I gathered 'em ...for you

This first one is for a Deceased Mother

If I could have just one wish

And never have another

It would be to have 5 minutes

And spend it with my Mother

I would tell you how I miss you

And wish that you could stay

Just to see your face again

On this, your Mothers Day.

Mothers Day Poems

Love, trust, friendliness and courage
are some of the lessons you taught me.
What a great start you gave me in life.

Have A Very Happy Mother's Day!

***

You show your love in little ways --
In warming smiles and words of praise,
In things you do to brighten days...
You always show you care.
You show your love by hurts you ease,
By giving such fond memories,
But Mother, more than all of these...
By always being there!

Have A Very Happy Mother's Day!

***

A Mother's Day wish
That is warm and sincere
For someone who's always
So sweet and so dear --
Here's hoping you find
That with each passing day,
The best things in life
Will keep coming your way!

Mothers Day Poems


It takes somebody special
To listen and to care,
To encourage and inspire
And to show she's always there...
So I hope that you'll remember,
Each day the whole year through,
You're someone very special
And you always will be too

***


Thanks for all you've done for me,
And all that you still do.
Thanks for being patient
And so understanding too...
Thanks for all the help you give
And all the joy you bring.
On Mothers Day, just want to say,
Thanks for everything!

Mothers Day Poems


Of all the special joys in life
The big ones and the small.
A mothers love and tenderness,
Is the greatest of them all.

***

I hope you like

More
Mothers Day Poems

This 'Mothers Day Poems' blog entry is mine, copyright Jon Bratton 2009, which is cheeky because I just found them..but build a bridge...get over it

St Patricks Day Poems

This wonderful image is from
http://www.wondercliparts.com/holidays/st_patricks_day/

Well worth a visit

Next Tuesday is St Patrick's Day so the search has started for St Patricks Day Poems. Here's one I've just penned

Ah, Good Luck te ye, Good Luck te ye

Here's some words I'm urged to say

Leprechauns, shamrock and rainbows
And have a happy St Paddy's Day

More words.. New York, mind me harp
Green hats, for sure and green beer too
And drinking gallons of Guinness
It's the law, it's what you've got to do

Top o' the morning to you
From the bottom o' me heart

Erin go Bragh
(Ireland Forever)

Jon Bratton 2009

Here's poem #2 in my St Patricks Day Poems collection

Wear a big hat

But it must be green

Drink some Guinness

It's March Seventeen

Jon Bratton 2009

If you want more, click the link

St Patricks Day Poems

This 'St Patricks Day Poems' blog is copyright Jon Bratton 2009. Individuals may use the poem for non commercial purposes

Wedding Poem from Bride to Groom

This fabulous image is from http://www.aaronphoto.co.nz a fantastic photographer with a unique style. The big white frock looks like a flower

This Wedding Poem from Bride to Groom has been on my Verses4Cards site for a few years but it's sorta buried amongst many other wedding poems so I thought I'd give it a higher billing. Until the last line, the poem reads as if it is from anyone..the groom's parents, the bride's parents, the best man, a well wisher. I just love the word 'frock'

(Jeremy) have a lovely day

As you enter Paradise

Look out for the girl in the big white frock

You'll find her very nice

Take your place by her side

Squeeze her hand with a loving touch

Say "I do" and she will too

For she loves you very much

She knows that you love her too

And that you'll always be her rock

This card, it comes with the fondest love

From the girl in the big white frock

Jon Bratton c 2005

Want to read another? Click the link

Wedding Poem from Bride to Groom

This 'Wedding Poem from Bride to Groom' blog entry is copyright Jon Bratton 2009 but brides are welcome to use it. Website publishers may use it, with permission, and credit must be given
jon@jbratton.com