Sunday, 14 December 2008

Leaving Poem

This is a continuation of the leaving poem started the day before yesterday. In this section Martin and Gill, a married couple are discussed

Anyway, who are these five people
Who will pretty soon be gone
It's time for us to name them
And insult them one by one

Let's start with Gill, a talented actress
A girl of many parts
She can play a really marvelous drunk
Who hiccups, burps and....falls over

Gill's been in so many plays
'Absent Friends' was a nice piece
Ah yes Dianna, she only wanted one affair
The entire Canadian Mounted Police

She was in Shakespeare's Ladies
And in 'What the Butler Saw'
And two parts in the Comedy Hour
And she still came back for more

And in 'Move Over Mrs Markham'
She really can't go wrong
All tweedy drawers and sensible shoes
It'll be her great swan song

That's where she has a "man that does"
Which is somewhat ironic
Cos Martin would like to, but usually can't
After a night on sid and tonic

Are you saying his connubial duties
He is failing to fulfill
I'm just saying-once he's said yes to a pint
He always says no to a Gill

But Martin really loves his wife
Then he should really love her first
It's not his fault, it's just he has
A most prodigious thirst

But he must be a man that does
Every now and then
Oh of course....three times
Charis, Luke and Jen

No I'm not having it
(Oh you as well, huh?)
We can't treat a friend this way
OK, Clever Clogs
You think of something nice to say're really glad there's a few more months
Before he finally retires
And he's going to be a tremendous loss
To the local sid suppliers

He's been a great help to them
I must say, quite ingeniously
Now look, Martin doesn't drink that much
What? He takes it intravenously?

Martin's made a marvelous contribution
To this town's theatre life
Oh you mean while he was boozing at the darts
He sent along his wife

No, I mean he's contributed a great deal
To the theatres of this town
Oh yes, I remember his two cultured acts of drama
Balox meets Charlie Brown

I really think you've said enough
You're all the same, you men
You never mentioned Martin's producing skills
I did, Charis, Luke and Jen

It's a bit of a slog, writing a blog without feedback. I'd be made up if, before you made off, you made a comment

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